Oh the Places You'll Go Because of the Places You Went

I drove through my old neighborhood this week.

Immediately flooded with a million shades of red and orange on the trees and a million little emotions.

This was where I grew up, this is where my life sort of began.

I made friends here.

Made many memories, some good and some bad.

Goodness, some that I just want to forget.

I drove past my old house and couldn’t help but laugh at the size of the pine tree out front, and the three other trees we planted in the backyard.

They were HUGE. Like towered over the house huge.

I remember how small they were, and how small I was when we planted them.

I pulled off to the side of the road a little to take a closer look at the house.

There were big red bulbs at the top of that pine tree- our Christmas lights from years ago.

Again, I laughed.

The tree got too tall to even take them down, now three years later, even harder to remove. I guess the new owners think so too.

Or, maybe they don’t even notice them.

Maybe my eyes were just drawn to them because, well, it was where I grew up and those lights were a consistent part of my life.

I can remember my dad going out every year, with his ladder, stick and lights, stringing them around the trees and bushes. He worked hard to make the house, and specifically that tree, look perfect at Christmas time.

I pulled up a little more, and noticed that there was now a fence in the backyard.

A new touch, something we didn’t grow up with here, and I’m actually thankful we didn’t.

Without a fence we had free range to go anywhere in our backyard, our neighbor’s backyards- anywhere.

We could all play together.

I started missing the house, the friends, the homey feeling.

I missed my childhood cat, Daisy.

I missed the memories and experiences.

In that moment, I wanted it all back.

I wanted to be that 7 year old girl again that could walk to my friend’s house.

I wanted to be the 12 year old girl that swam all day at the pool.

I wanted to be the 14 year old that walked all day with her best friend.

Gosh, in that moment I wanted to play in the leaves.

So, I pulled the car over, got out, went to the middle of the road, and I just stood there.

I stood there in awe of where I grew up.

I stood there in awe of the beautiful leaves that surrounded me.

And after the longing to be back faded, I stood there in awe of where I once was & where I was now.

Truly a breath-taking moment.

Ironically, later that day, I went to dinner in another place that shaped me.

This place, though, didn’t give off the same homey feel that the other one did.

This place actually took me back to a time in my life that I am not proud of, but one I know I was meant to reside in for some time.

As I drove to the restaurant, the roads became more and more familiar, as did the bad memories.

I started seeing an old version of myself in the back of my mind, one that I only recognized when looking in a rearview mirror.

The roads reminded me of times I cried coming home and the times I drove through feeling completely lost.

I saw physical signs that figuratively represented the person I was within this place.

As hard as it was, it was actually another breath-taking moment.

Because, I drove to this place changed.

I drove through this place not only unaffected by what was, but completely new because of it.

This place, as hard as “living” here was, was as necessary and important as my old neighborhood.

It shaped me, too.

And, unlike the trees in my yard, this place looked small and I felt big.

I towered over it.

And also unlike my experience in my old neighborhood, I did not feel the need to get out of the car and take it all in, but only drive completely past it.

And, that is life y’all.

There are places that are just a part of us.

Good and bad.

Old and new.

Ugly and beautiful.

It’s as simple as that.

We cannot change this.

We cannot remove these places either.

We can only accept them.

Because… get this… we would not be who we are today without ANY of those places.

We would not be in the place we are today without stopping in other places.

I am not afraid to say that I deeply love my current place.

I love where God has me.

I love the people in my life, the work I am doing, the changes I am seeing.

I love the new strength I see in myself and the new challenges I face.

I love my hubby, my zoo, my family, my home.

I absolutely love this season of life, and I owe it all to the places I’ve been.

We’ve all heard of the Dr. Seuss book “Oh the Places You’ll Go”, right?

A line I have heard through many moments of my life.

Oh the places you’ll go after high school.

Oh the places you’ll go after college.

Oh the places you’ll go after you get married or have kids.

Oh the places you’ll go after you reach your dream.

But, right now, all I want to say is oh the places I’ve been!

Oh the places I have conquered and won.

Oh the places I have lost and found.

Oh the places I have learned and taught.

Oh the PLACE I am CURRENTLY in!

And, Oh the places that I have come from!

Life is too short to not appreciate exactly where you came from.

And, life is too short to not take that in.

This week, I realized what has shaped me.

Home has shaped me.

And I realized that where I am at is what will continue to make me.

Then, I know that God will take me.

Take me to whatever place I am meant to be in next.

That is what it all comes down to.

No matter the places we’ve been or the places left to go, He is the one who TAKES us there.

He puts us in specific places that will shape and change us, places that grow us.

Then, someday, He will move us to new places that will do the same.

Then, He might take you back to those places and remind you where you were.

And although those places might remind you of how small you were, He will remind you of how big you are now.

Like the trees towering over the house, we will then tower over who we used to be, allowing us to see how far we’ve come.

Then, we will see the lights left in the tree, the marks that we have left on those places, as well as the marks those places have left on us.

And, then…

We might just get out of the car, taking it all in.

Or, we might just keep driving past, remembering the place, but recognizing how we’ve grown past it.

Either choice, allowing us to see the place in a different way, from a different perspective.

That’s how we have to do it.

Some places are meant to be revisited, while others are only meant to be passed by.

But, they are to never be forgotten.

Because where we are now is because of those places we’ve been.

And now, I am sitting in the airport, waiting to board my flight to where my now is.

I can’t tell you how good that feels.

Of course, it was great being in those past places, remembering the times spent in those places, getting new closure on those places, and gaining new perspectives from those places, but I am ready to be CURRENT in my now.

I am ready to live in this place that God has me in, until He takes me to the next place.

So, as I wrap up this post, I am also wrapping up my time in those places, and making a choice to not only hold onto those places, but be fully submerged in this place.

THIS is my place.

And no, I don’t mean Jacksonville.

I simply mean the person that I am.

The calling God has currently placed before me.

The people I currently interact with.

The challenges I face, the problems I have to solve.

My current emotions, state of mind.

The things of life I am figuring out.

My growing faith.

My dreams, my goals.

THIS…. is my place.

This is where I am at, and I am ready to see where God takes me next.